"Protip: If you have diarrhea, avoid smelling pepper."

Thursday Twittles

@AyhamTamari : Today is my birthday. I turn 27 years old. I turn the machinery around an axis.

@myaltered_ego : Sorry I haven't tweeted in a few days. Been busy SAVING LIVES! But continue to eat bunt cake and judge from your pedestal.

@dcwilhite : Protip: If you have diarrhea, avoid smelling pepper.

@abigvictory : I have officially declared today Make Fun of Nickelback Day. So, carry on as normal.

@keithland : My Goal used to be to make a sex tape with my girlfriend, now its for her to let me live tweet all the action